I Am Haunted by Humans.

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Yeah, maybe I’m just a little clingy piece of shit, but I love you more than anyone ever could.

(via the-psycho-cutie)

(Source: kissmyscarsdarling, via sonicimperfection)


actualmenacebuckybarnes:

snarkasaurus:

cracked:

A note about that headline: This is not a fake article.
5 Shockingly Unexpected Cures for Common Health Problems

#5. Fingering Your Asshole Can Cure Hiccups
Yes, science says it’s possible to stop your intractable hiccups with a good rectal massage, and yes, they’re being serious. It appears that the hiccups are closely connected with the vagus nerve, which runs all the way from your brain to your diaphragm … and finally, near the rectum. The nerve interacts with others near the diaphragm, causing the fully formed “fuck you, body” experience that is the hiccups. The only moderately certain way to truly calm down that nerve is to confuse it with deliberate overstimulation (such as scaring someone to make their whole body flinch), and the most effective way to do that is to … manually access it. Which, of course, means sticking stuff up your butt.

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too good not to share

i’m so confused by that picture of a starfish

autisticqueermihashi:

piratecoves:

poopflow:

people who dry swallow pills go hard as hell and should not be fucked with

i used to dry swallow pills until a searing pain developed in my throat and chest and with the help of the world wide web i found out it burned a hole in my fucking throat please take your pills with water kiddies it’s worth it

HOLY SHIT OKAY

(via sonicimperfection)

  • Me: Who's a good boy?
  • Dog: ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
  • Me: YOU'RE A GOOD BOY!
  • Dog: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’m afraid I’ll never finish college. I’m afraid I’ll finish college with student loans I can never pay back. I’m afraid I’ll get a degree and won’t be able to find a job in that field. I’m afraid I’ll get a degree, get the job I dreamed of, and hate it.

A Mental Illness Happy Hour listener whose list of fears matches mine four for four. Glad I’m not the only one. (via mukoros)

(Source: insensiblenothingness, via darrenselena)


I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday.

Lemony Snicket  (via tinykittenfist)

(Source: larmoyante, via marilynnalva)


It’s discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.

Noel Coward, Blithe Spirit (via quoted-books)

wsswatson:

a bi/pan person marrying someone does not indicate a preference for that gender, it indicates a preference for that PERSON

(via b0om-bo0m)